Normal People follows the friendship and romance between two youths from small-town Ireland, Connell and Marianne. The characters are both somewhat extraordinary — smart, attractive, and, in their own ways and social contexts, popular. At the same time they each, in their own ways, struggle to relate with people and fit into their broader social environments. The title is rather ironic; at varying points, Marianne and Connell long to be “like normal people” while deriving confidence and a sense of self from what makes them each stand out. Like “normal people,” they also struggle with the confusion and intensity of juvenile love and self-discovery.
Marianne grows up in a wealthy family, but an abusive one. Her father dies when she is young, but her mother remains scarred and unattached, permitting Marianne’s brother to abuse Marianne. Perhaps in self protection, she retreats into herself in high school, making no friends and caring not at all what others think of her. It is not until she leaves for university and is able to leave behind her family and reinvent herself (and surround herself with others of her class) that she forms friendships. While not preoccupied with how her peers regard her, she desperately wants to be loved, and in her darkest moments, considers herself to be unlovable. Because of this tension, she lets her romantic partners and friends mistreat her, and, sometimes, even invites them to mistreat her in hopes they will love her more for it. Like many young women who struggle with control over their lives, she develops an eating disorder. She surrounds herself with unpleasant people because they accept her into their circle and sometimes treat her lovingly. She is also lively, cultured, socially graceful, and politically conscious — she attends protests for Palestinian liberation and criticizes capitalism.
Connell grows up in poverty. His mother, who was from a “bad family”, had him as a teenager; his father is unnamed. In contrast to Marianne’s, his home life is loving and accepting; his mother, who works as a cleaner for Marianne’s mother, also serves as a parental figure for Marianne. Perhaps because of the circumstances of his birth, Connell is very conscious of the social dynamics and hierarchies of the high school social scene, and worries how others see him. Although he is bookish and sensitive, he navigates the toxic masculinity, low brow humour, and gossipy inclinations of this milieu and is popular (“Everyone likes you,” Marianne tells him, and the words flutter in his heart for days afterwards). Transitioning to university, he finds himself socially isolated; his lower class rural accent marks him as an outsider, and his quiet nature is read as stupid instead of thoughtful. Because of his family’s wealth, academic success is not just a matter of pride and ambition for him, but of his ability to eat.
The epigraph for Normal People is taken from the famous novelist George Eliot: “It is one of the secrets in that change of mental poise which has been fitly named conversion, that to many among us neither heaven nor earth has any revelation till some personality touches theirs with a peculiar influence, subduing them into receptiveness.” I thought it was a great choice: our narrative begins as a romance buds between Marianne and Connell, and revolves around their on-again-off-again relationship and the way they shape each other. Other characters play essentially bit parts, which some reviewers have criticized; I enjoyed this authorial decision since it brings to the foreground the intensity and importance of the relationship between them, and reflects their own self-centeredness that challenges their relationships with others.
Despite how important they are to each other, their romance proceeds in fits and starts. They are limited by their own abilities to be vulnerable and to depend on each other. Negative reviews have complained about their frustrating inability to communicate, but in each heart-breaking instance, I found each of them to be very understandable (“People are a lot more knowable than they think they are,” Connell reflects). In fact, I think that’s something that makes this book special: it finds a way to take the uncertainty and turmoil and rapid change of late adolescence and early adulthood and detangles it, making it feel much clearer than it was to live it.
For example, Connell and Marianne break up after their first year in university because Connell can’t afford to stay in the city, but finds it too difficult to ask Marianne if he can live with her. Marianne, with her economic privilege, never thinks about affordability as something that might shape one’s decision-making, despite her familiarity with socialist literature. Instead, she takes Connell’s announcement that he is ending his lease as a break-up. In her desire to protect herself and in her assumption that she is probably unlovable, she coolly and maturely accepts his apparent request to end things, puzzling endlessly over it on her own afterwards. Reading this story arc, one might insist (as some negative reviewers imply), “how ridiculous, I would never end a rewarding relationship out of something so silly as not speaking openly about my feelings for fear of being at my most vulnerable” but I think that is how normal people operate, at least when they are young.
The book ends with them apart again, but this time it is a mutually accepted separation, with them expecting to unite again after Connell’s graduate school program (and with long emails in the meantime). They’ve defeated some of their demons, but not all; they are after all, only in their early twenties. They have many challenges yet to face as they reach adulthood.
I appreciate the author’s weaving of politics throughout the novel. Marianne and Connell come from different classes, and this shapes the trajectory of their relationship and their lives. They are politically engaged, and embedded in our real world; they discuss Edward Snowden, media bias, and other topical events of the 2010s. Perhaps because the author is a Marxist, she recognizes the interplay between the personal and the political, despite this being a novel closely focused on just one interpersonal relationship.
Rooney shines in creating emotionally rich scenes focused on mundane slices of life, like writing a long email to a friend, or meeting up with someone for coffee (Gabrielle Zevin's story never of a winding romance-friendship wishes it could do this, but falls back on melodramatic plot points for heightened intensity). Her dialogue reads so naturally, her prose is sparse and yet so emotionally affecting. I devoured the book in just a few days, and highlighted several passages that really spoke to me. I’m looking forward to reading some of her other books.